Sizes are FAKE! You can officially stop caring about them.
Do you identify with being a certain size?
If so, you might say things like, “I’m consistently a size 6.”
Maybe you even take pride in achieving or remaining at a certain size.
“I’ve been a size 8 since college”
“I’m back in my pre-pandemic size 4 jeans.”
If you feel like a certain size is part of your identity, you also know how devastating it feels when you try something on in that size and it’s too small.
It sounds something like, “I’m not a size 12 person, I’m a size 10 person!”
By going outside the bounds of your perceived identity, you feel like you have failed.
You are absolutely not alone for feeling this way. Most people have this feeling at some point in their lives.
I know that on more than one occasion, I’ve decided not to buy something because it didn’t fit in “my size.”
And you know what? That is a BIG MISTAKE. Not only are you missing out on wearing things you love but you’re also reinforcing the value of sizes and thinness by leaning into this mentality.
(Not to mention the styling potential of buying certain items too big on purpose, but we can save that for another day.)
But it’s not too late to unlearn this for good.
The Mindset Shift: Sizes Don’t Matter
Being upset that you are bigger than the size you deem acceptable is a very common experience. However, this reinforces the idea that being smaller is better and being bigger is worse.
It’s not your fault. You were raised, and still live, in toxic diet culture that talks about, and places value on, people’s bodies like this:
And she was PREGNANT during this time period. Le sigh.
And let’s not forget our parents who raised us with their toxic understanding of diet culture, which was cultivated by ads like these:
For generations, media of every type has raised us to believe that thinner is better. Thin means beauty, thin means willpower, thin is morally superior.
It’s not your fault you have these feelings inside of you but that doesn’t mean you can’t do anything about them.
Here is one thing you can do today that will have a HUGE impact.
Change your media diet.
Think critically about the tv, film and creators that you watch/follow. Is it mostly thin people? If so, seek out media that celebrates bodies of different shapes and sizes. This will change your definition of beauty.
A few recommendations:
Broadening your view of what can be beautiful will impact how you see beauty in others and more importantly, yourself.
The Practical Shift: Sizes are FAKE
I’ll never stop talking about this.
SIZES! ARE! FAKE!
The way clothes are made has changed significantly in the last few decades. Manufacturing has become a global business that is changing constantly due to local and international regulations, economic factors, labor factors, environmental factors, supply chain constraints and more. As a result, clothes are made in more places than ever, leading to extremely inconsistent sizing.
So where does that leave us? With clothes and accessories that fit the same body in a wide range of sizes.
I recently did a full closet inventory for a client, put it all in a spreadsheet and sorted it by type and size. Shoes ranged from 9.5 - 11.5. Pants ranged from 31 - 34. Sweaters were 40% Medium, 60% Large. This was AFTER the closet edit. These were all items that fit the client’s current body, comfortably.
Another example, in this photo, each of these items fit me well:
Jacket is XS, belt is Small, top is Medium, pants are Large. I cover a spectrum of 4 sizes, with one fairly evenly-proportioned body.
So what does that mean for you? Even if your body doesn’t change, your size will. While this makes shopping harder, I hope it enables you to release any attachment to being a certain size, because you literally can’t be anymore. Nothing you do to your body will change the inconsistencies in the fashion industry, so you may as well use that to your advantage.
So shop for what fits, try on four sizes if you need to. If you don’t like the size on the tag, just cut it off. It doesn’t mean anything and pretty soon, you will forget what it was anyway.
All you will know is that you have a garment you love that fits your body.
And THAT is what matters.
Say it with me now, SIZES! ARE! FAKE!
Not caring about sizes is not something that happens overnight but just like any other mindset shift, you can do it if you focus on it. If you’re struggling to get there, cut the tags off everything you own. What you can’t see, can’t hurt you.
Once you’ve shifted your mindset on sizing, your life will be easier, richer and full of clothes you love, that love you back (because they fit and feel good)!